69... Some might call it nasty... I call it a romantic dinner for 2!!
Worried Mom gave their daughter a pack of Condoms before a date.
Girl Laughs, Hugs Mom an replies,
Times have changed Mom. I'm dating Angela, Give Me Carrots!
A lady takes a stained shirt to the dry cleaner. She asks the clerk if it can be cleaned. Partially deaf, he says "Come again?" She responds "No, it's YOGURT!"
The definition of trust: Two cannibals giving each other a blow job
Why is a blow job the best breakfast? There's a sausage, two nuts and a protein shot ;)
What does a G-spot, a woman's Birthday and a urinal have in common? Men seem to miss all three!
A blow-job is the only job in the world that can't be included in your resume despite years of experience and a number of references!
Best way to get OVER someone is to get UNDER someone else...jus sayin!!
..Is offline...playing with themself..wait..wait..stop..no..I MEANT to say..BY themself..playing BY themself!!
Why do guys think more then girls, and why do girls talk more then guys? Because guys have two heads and girls have two sets of lips ;)
research shows that 90% of men don't know how to use a condom these people are called dads.
Today, I saw a couple of beetles doing it. Jealous, I quickly crushed them with my boot while screaming, "IF I CAN'T DO IT, NOBODY WILL!"
While making love, they says to their wife "Babe, let's do a 68" Wife asks, "68? Whats that?" So the husband replies "You do it to me and Ill owe you 1"
Question of the day: You are in bed with a hot girl and a gay guy and you are all naked. Who do you turn your back to when you go to sleep?
How are woman and tornado's alike? They both moan when they come, and take the house when they leave.
Bacon is bacon eggs are eggs don't let them boys between your legs they say your cute they say your god-dam fine NINE months later they say it ain't mine !
When a man talks dirty to a woman its sexual harassment but when a woman talks dirty to a man its $3.15 per min...
It's wet, rub it up & down. If it's small put 2 fingers in it, if it's big put 3 fingers in it.. Yup, that's how to wash a cup!